It is once again Thanksgiving Day and your birthday on the same day. I am so grateful for the peace, the courage and strength Papa God gives me to keep choosing to dance as I continue the journey of loss and grief.

Your 9th birthday in heaven…. How does time keep moving on when at times it seems I’m still back in the farmhouse hearing the noises from all six of you children playing outside? How does someone live in two worlds at the same time? How can your cousin that was born the same year as you be old enough to get married and yet in my mind, you’re still my little girl? Did you grow up in heaven? There are so many questions that will not be answered on this side of eternity. There is so much pain, so much hard, so much loss, so much ugliness in this broken world; yet here we find ourselves living in a world we were never meant for. Our hearts, our souls long for the world you are immensely enjoying. I take so much comfort and rest in the truth that God is okay with my questions without answers, that God is accepting and understanding of my so very human responses to this broken world. I keep looking for and longing for when I will be with you again and until that time, I know Papa God will celebrate you and love you and take good care of you till we are together again.