We took Jana back for her eye testing and yes, she needs glasses and eye therapy. She’s got her glasses now and I think she looks very nice in them. And eye therapy starts tomorrow, once a week for the next 6-10 months. We also were encouraged by her therapists to look into some psychology therapy as well to help us know how to deal with some of the social and emotional issues that go along with brain trauma.  And we did find a Christian psychologist who has worked with traumatic brain injuries and had our first visit with them. It went well, I think and thankfully its covered by her insurance but they suggested once a week and we felt like that’s a little too often. We went with every other week. So now again, I’m back to going to therapy 3 times a week. I try to tell myself, “You can do this. You’ve done it before. Why does it feel so overwhelming this time?” and I think its because the weeks of Christmas and New Years, we had no therapy at all. I got to stay home and I realized how wonderful and special it was to stay home and do just normal household chores. And I was made aware again how much our lives have changed. And rather frankly, it irritates me, frustrates me, makes me question God and His sovereignty. But I’ve been reading a book by Stasi Eldredge and she writes, “Let suffering be the door you walk through that draws you to deeper intimacy with Jesus. Suffering can do that, if we let it. And though it would never be the doorway we would choose, it is one we will never regret walking through.” And later in the book, “Sorrow is one of the realities of life. To be mature women, we have to be awake to the ache. Let it be a doorway for us to walk through to find a deeper intimacy with God. We ask God to meet us–right in the ache.” Isn’t that wonderful! God can and will meet us right in the middle of the deep heartbreaking ache. And it also reminds me of a song sent to me by a friend, “The honest cries of  breaking hearts are better than a hallelujah sometimes.” I believe its true, God would rather have me honest with my heart, with myself; cause its there He can meet me and heal me than for me to try to keep all the rules of what I think Christianity is supposed to look like.